I've been trying my hardest to give up caffeine! I did so well for weeks, but today ::EPIC FAIL:: (That was for you, Sarah Y.!). Yes, I went to Starbucks on my way to the DMV, and enjoyed every single sip of my extra-hot, non-fat, vanilla latte! Mmmmm! It turned my stomach into a hot pit of sugary goodness! De-light-ful! Of course, now my heart is crazily beating out of my chest-- which is the very reason I decided to give it up in the first place. Ah. I don't regret my decision too much--I definitely needed the jump-start this morning!
Speaking of indulgence, I've been back on the diet wagon the last couple of weeks. The weight thing has been the biggest obstacle in my life, not because of how I feel about myself, but how other people feel. I've been an emotional eater since childhood. It doesn't help that if I'm not outright dieting I gain weight--so I always have to think about it. The catch 22 with emotional eating is that as soon as someone makes a comment about my weight, I want to turn to food. When you struggle with weight, it's the first weapon people use when they're upset at you. I can't even begin to describe the hurtful (often deliberately so) comments that have been aimed in my direction by my family, my in-laws, friends, people I hardly know--craziness! If nothing else, what a lack of creativity! ;-) Yesterday ended up being an emotional eating day, but I kept myself in check. I over-indulged a bit, but not too bad. Letting the crap of other people prevent me from reaching my goals is my fault. I wish I had learned this lesson years ago!
No comments:
Post a Comment