That bad things happen to good people. Sometimes really bad things happen to really good people with no real explanation.
That I didn't know what faith was until some of my greatest fears started staring me in the face. And to be honest, it's still a struggle.
That it's ok to say "Sorry, that doesn't work for me" and saying "Oh well" when they get upset about it is called "maintaining boundaries". It only took me 27 years to learn that lesson.
That you can have 300 "friends" on facebook, and still feel intense loneliness when things get hard.
That something that tries so hard to be "different" often ends up to be just as bad, if not worse then the "original".
That sitting on my bed folding clothes could be the most peaceful time of the day.
That the closer you get to God, the more you realize how messy your life is.
That it's ok to eat a cupcake for breakfast now and then.
The beauty of a good song put on "repeat".
When it's time to call something a loss, and move on.
That I never thought I'd hope to have Swine Flu until I had the flu, and realized it wasn't too bad.
How much I had missed getting a good night of sleep.
That one question could dredge up so much pain.
That you can listen to your mp3 player during church worship, and no one will even notice if you wear your hair down. In my defense I was listening to worship music, and was trying to keep myself focused, and not distracted by some resentfulness that keeps rearing it's ugly head.
That I'm a Starbucks addict. Maybe I already knew that.
That sorry Michael W. Smith, friends aren't always "friends forever" just because "the Lords the Lord of them", But I wish it was true.
So anyway, that has been my last few months. It's been a rough road, and I'm not sure when it's going to get better. My future months are going to be filled with vacations, school, work, genetic testing (fun stuff), weddings, and hopefully a Christmas away from home! So some things I'm looking forward to, some answers to important questions, and some things I'm dreading, but all is life. I'm being constantly reminded how good I have it compared to some, and that God really is in control of all things.
2 comments:
I follow your blog, (though not quite sure how I originally found it), but there is so much wisdom and I totally agree with what you wrote. Some of those things, like when to call something a loss and move on.. is such a hard thing to learn, or feel confident in knowing when it's truly a loss.
Hi Christine!
I have lots of blogs that I follow too, that I have no idea how I came across!
I enjoy blogging, but I figure if I'm going to blog, I might as well be honest about what's going on in my life. It isn't always pretty, but it's real, ya know? I started this blog at a time where I was learning to set boundaries, and stand up for myself. It's been met with lost friendships, relationships, and people being angry at me. So I've been walking away from things that aren't healthy. I used to just cower down, and try to change myself to make things work. I didn't realize how hard it would be to say no, and move on. It's the toughest lesson I've ever learned (or tried to learn, I'm still learning)!
Thank you so much for reading my jumbled thoughts! Hope you had a fantastic Thanksgiving!
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